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Fed up with Masterchef

{{forumThread.upVotes}} Created by Nobby 6 March 2012 02:35 2913 views Link  
Nobby 6 March 2012 02:35
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Originally Posted by
Fed up with Masterchef

Cooking programmes are an instant turn-off for me. It started with UK Master-chef. then the custard hit the fan and we had Master-chef Australia, Master-chef New Zealand, and now from Australia we have Junior Master-chef Australia, using ten-year-old kids! I fully expect to see Superannuitant Master-chef, Gay Master-chef, Lesbians with Adopted Kids Master-chef,and possibly Zimbabwe Master-chef. What with all these Masters and Jamie bloody Oliver on every channel saving schools, Im all cheffed out.
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Mike Pass 6 March 2012 07:45
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Originally Posted by
hhmmm!!!!

Just wait until Black Country Masterchef...........then yowll see bostin fittle, ay it!
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Vicky 6 March 2012 08:40
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Originally Posted by
Fed up with masterchef

Yuou have missed out Celebrity Mastechef Colin.
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Nobby 6 March 2012 08:43
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Originally Posted by
Id rather watch a Tolstoy play in Urdu while being tortured by a superannuitant, bi-polar, gay amputee chef from Northern Siberia than watch another cooking programme!
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Nobby 6 March 2012 08:44
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Originally Posted by
Mind you, Nigella can come and peel my spuds any time she likes...
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Mike Pass 6 March 2012 13:38
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Originally Posted by
Hhhmmm!!!!

Quoting: Colin Hall I'd rather watch a Tolstoy play in Urdu while being tortured by a superannuitant, bi-polar, gay amputee chef from Northern Siberia than watch another cooking programme! I saw Checkovs The Cherry Orchard performed in Xhosa at the last Black Country Night out. The clicking got on my pip after a bit though. Looking forward to next Thursday evening. It is readings from the existentialist works of Dostoevsky, in Finnish Scouse. Cor wait!
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Terry Carey 7 March 2012 12:28
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Originally Posted by
Fed

I blame Graham Kerr for starting it all off. Or was it F-a-n-n-y Craddock and Johny? TC. The site wouldnt let this on until I put the hyphens in the name Fa..y. Last edited by Terry Carey
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John (Scouse) Hirons 7 March 2012 13:47
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Originally Posted by
Alright Terry, I always thought Philip Harben was the first TV burner of comestibles. What always bemused me was that Graham Kerr was ex-Catering Corps, what did he know about cooking?
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..... 7 March 2012 14:57
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: Terry Carey I blame Graham Kerr for starting it all off. Or was it F-a-n-n-y Craddock and Johny? TC.   The site wouldn't let this on until I put the hyphens in the name Fa..y.   Last edited by Terry Carey As a used to be a Gynacologist (part time) I wonder if you meant Hymens Terry?, cos thats quite Fanny.
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..... 7 March 2012 15:00
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Originally Posted by
[QUOTE]Quoting: John (scouse) Hirons Alright Terry, I always thought Philip Harben was the first TV burner of comestibles. What always bemused me was that Graham Kerr was ex-Catering Corps, what did he know about cooking? [/QUOTE Scouse. Who was that Chef that was the "Galloping Goumet"? , charging about on our Mams 10 inch Black and white T.V.
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John Richards 7 March 2012 15:13
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Originally Posted by
Fed up with Masterchef.

My feelings on all these cooking programmes are summed up simply by changing one letter .......... Masturchef.
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..... 7 March 2012 16:11
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: John Richards My feelings on all these cooking programmes are summed up simply by changing one letter .......... Masturchef. Likewise Master Baker John. (I never go near cream cakes for that reason)
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John (Scouse) Hirons 7 March 2012 17:31
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: john daly Quoting: John (scouse) Hirons Alright Terry, I always thought Philip Harben was the first TV burner of comestibles. What always bemused me was that Graham Kerr was ex-Catering Corps, what did he know about cooking? [/QUOTE Scouse. Who was that Chef that was the "Galloping Goumet"? , charging about on our Mams 10 inch Black and white T.V. Alright John, The Galloping Gourmet was Graham Kerr he was on the box in 1970/71ish. If your Mam watched a cook in black & white it would have been Philip Harben (he knew about cooking he was ex-RAF) he was on in the early 50s.
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..... 7 March 2012 17:44
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: John (scouse) Hirons Alright John, The 'Galloping Gourmet' was Graham Kerr he was on the box in 1970/71ish. If your Mam watched a cook in black & white it would have been Philip Harben (he knew about cooking he was ex-RAF) he was on in the early '50s. You are so Right Scouse, got it the wrong way round.Ta for that.
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Nobby 7 March 2012 17:47
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: John (scouse) Hirons Alright John, The 'Galloping Gourmet' was Graham Kerr he was on the box in 1970/71ish. If your Mam watched a cook in black & white it would have been Philip Harben (he knew about cooking he was ex-RAF) he was on in the early '50s. I knew Kerr, sort of. He was a catering officer in the RNZAF for while.
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Terry Carey 8 March 2012 18:20
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Originally Posted by
Fed up with Masterchef

Quoting: john daly As a used to be a Gynacologist (part time) I wonder if you meant  Hymens Terry?, cos thats quite Fanny. John, How did you manager to get your Fanny on! TC
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Terry Carey 8 March 2012 18:23
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Originally Posted by
Fed

Scouse, You are probably right with saying Philip Harben predates Graham Kerr and F a n n y Craddock and I deliberately left off Grahams soubriquet of The Galloping Gourmet I just wondered if anyone would know it but sure enough I was not alone in remembering that. TC.
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Terry Carey 8 March 2012 18:25
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Originally Posted by
Fed

What is it with this on-site censorship. Either we can put F a n n y on or we cant? TC
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Mike Pass 8 March 2012 18:33
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Originally Posted by
Hhmmm!!!!!

Quoting: Terry Carey John, How did you manager to get your F anny on! TC He pulled it on over his head and then put his arms through the legs, innit?!
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..... 8 March 2012 18:36
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: Terry Carey John, How did you manager to get your F a n n y on! TC Easy, me being a Gyny Terry. Do you know why they always put a C+ ck on a weather vane on top of a steeple??. cos if they put a F a n n y on top the wind would blow straight through. Whooooo.
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Terry Carey 8 March 2012 18:38
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Originally Posted by
Fed up etc

Still bl**dy inconsistent innit???? TC.
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..... 8 March 2012 18:38
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: john daly       Easy, me being a Gyny Terry. Do you know why they always put a C+ ck on a weather vane on top of a steeple??. 'cos if they put a F a n n y  on top the wind would blow straight through.  Whooooo. Ps. It would not let me put C:ck or F a n n y on
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John (Scouse) Hirons 8 March 2012 18:58
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: Terry Carey John, How did you manager to get your F anny on! TC Alright Terry, Theres just no answer to that but to say look in the Ladybird Book What to do when the light goes out by the Chinese anthropologist Fu King from Wankin university.
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John (Scouse) Hirons 8 March 2012 19:00
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: Terry Carey Scouse, You are probably right with saying Philip Harben predates Graham Kerr and F a n n y Craddock and I deliberately left off Graham's soubriquet of 'The Galloping Gourmet'  I just wondered if anyone would know it but sure enough I was not alone in remembering that. TC. Alright Terry, Us old botty burps stick together me auld mate.
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..... 8 March 2012 19:10
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: Terry Carey John, How did you manager to get your F a n n y  on! TC    Coincidentally The Manager at our local Tesco is often referred to, by his staff, as a right F a n n y or something similar. Last edited by john daly
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Nobby 8 March 2012 19:26
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Originally Posted by
I was in ANZUK in Singapore for two years 1974-76 and one of our Locally Employed Civilians was a Chinese name of Fuk Yu, but known to all and sundry as "Charlie".
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Sigs 8 March 2012 21:08
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Originally Posted by
fed up with masterchef

I worked in the food trade for over 30 years and I watch almost all of the cooking shows but I like to cook and most of you fellers dont know how to cook .I was a master butcher had my own shop worked in the wholesale side in water street manchester and in three shops before I had my own shop .I love to cook and NZ lamb is the best in the world if you know how to cook it YLS.YMS.XLS. in a mutton cloth ,Fantastic food .And a window cloth as well .
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Roly01 9 March 2012 05:49
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: george woolley I worked in the food trade for over 30 years and I watch almost all of the cooking shows but I like to cook and most of you fellers dont know how to cook .I was a master butcher had my own shop worked in the wholesale side in water street manchester and in three shops before I had my own shop .I love to cook and NZ lamb is the best in the world if you know how to cook it YLS.YMS.XLS. in a mutton cloth ,Fantastic food .And a window cloth as well . And you spoilt it by not putting a photo of a well rounded Ewe. George, that is not good enough
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Spud 9 March 2012 06:50
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: george woolley I worked in the food trade for over 30 years and I watch almost all of the cooking shows but I like to cook and most of you fellers dont know how to cook .I was a master butcher had my own shop worked in the wholesale side in water street manchester and in three shops before I had my own shop .I love to cook and NZ lamb is the best in the world if you know how to cook it YLS.YMS.XLS. in a mutton cloth ,Fantastic food .And a window cloth as well . You mean you EAT our lambs? We thought they were going to England to be adopted by kind, lovng, generous married couples who cant have their own children.
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Al 9 March 2012 09:26
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Originally Posted by
Eat em, mate. We thrive on them in this house, put another load in the freezer yesterday. Often cheaper than Welsh or Irish lamb. I learnt to cook when the first Mrs. Mudge started her nursing training and immediately became a shiftworker. Me and three kids still had to eat. I enjoy Master Chef because it a competitive series, not because I want to do that precise style of cooking or presentation. I prefer watching the laid back talents of Raymond Blanc with his simple French country style of cooking along with a walloping great glass of rough robust red plonk to help it down. Very tasty meals and not rocket science. Hes a breath of fresh air amongst the often manic efforts of other TV chefs.
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John Richards 9 March 2012 12:46
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: Gerard Grout You mean you EAT our lambs? We thought they were going to England to be adopted by kind, lovng, generous married couples who can't have their own children. They are, Gerard, Ive adopted three, and they each have a bedroom. I have two boys, Baaaaary and Laaaaary, and a lovely little girl called Maaaaary. I couldnt possibly think of eating them .. .. .. .. theyre not big enough yet!
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Terry Carey 9 March 2012 15:19
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Originally Posted by
Fed up with Masterchef

Carrying on the sub-theme of Chinese or pseudo Chinese names this is a true story about Winston Churchill but relating to an Egyptian name. During the second world war he had to deal with an Egyptian Official who I think was in their Foreign Office. Churchill was well known for certain eccentricities in his behaviour as for instance the fact that he slept in his office on many nights. He slept in the nude and never bothered to dress if he got up when his secretary arrived for work. This no doubt embarrassed the poor girls but I think this anecdote tops that one. He would go to the door of his office instead of buzzing for his secretary and bellow out, Get me Mustapha Fuk for such was the fellows name. This little gem was one I gleaned from a book I borrowed which was about names - either real or assumed and name changes. An example of that latter was the boxer Azumah Nelson who changed his name from his birth name of ------wait for it ----- Nelson Azumah. TC.
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