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"Quote of the day"

{{forumThread.upVotes}} Created by Haggis 17 April 2008 10:33 261270 views Link  
Haggis 17 April 2008 10:33
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Originally Posted by
"Quote of the day"

By General Norman Swartzkopf: A couple of years ago I told 541,000 men what to do and when to do and it was done! Now I cant get a plumber to come to the house!
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Haggis 17 April 2008 10:47
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Originally Posted by
A different General

For those that dont know him, Major General Peter Cosgrove is an Australian treasure! General Cosgrove was interviewed on the radio recently. Youll love his reply to the lady who interviewed him concerning guns and children. Regardless of how you feel about gun laws youll love this! This is one of the best comeback lines of all time. It is a portion of an ABC interview between a female broadcaster and General Cosgrove who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military headquarters. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Cosgrove, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base? GENERAL COSGROVE: Were going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery and shooting. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Shooting! Thats a bit irresponsible, isnt it? GENERAL COSGROVE: I dont see why, theyll be properly supervised on the rifle range. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Dont you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children? GENERAL COSGROVE: I dont see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: But youre equipping them to become violent killers. GENERAL COSGROVE: Well, Maam, youre equipped to be a prostitute, but youre not one, are you? The radio went silent and the interview ended
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K.A .The Robin 17 April 2008 11:11
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day.... You know youre getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you can do while youre down there. George Burns.
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Silver Surfer 17 April 2008 23:38
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

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Haggis 18 April 2008 09:46
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Originally Posted by
Admiral Nelson

Nelson is quoted to have said "I see no ships" having put the telescope to his blind eye, this is in fact wrong, The clash on April 2 1801 proved to be Nelson's hardest-fought victory - and much closer than he was prepared to admit. So punishing was the Danish fire that Nelson's superior ordered him to break off the action. The admiral famously raised the telescope to his blind eye and said 'I really do not see the signal!' - not, as people regularly misquote 'I see no ships' - and continued the battle, victoriously.
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Silver Surfer 18 April 2008 12:21
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

Men dont mind sleeping on the couch , Its like camping out
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Owen Removed 18 April 2008 15:31
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.
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Haggis 18 April 2008 15:32
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Originally Posted by
A few odd ones. Be thankful were not getting all the government were paying for. Will Rogers Outside of a dog, a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog, its too dark to read. Groucho Marx I cant understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it. George Burns Coffee isnt my cup of tea. Samuel Goldwyn I do benefits for all religions. Id hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality. Bob Hope Drawing on my fine command of the language, I said nothing. Robert Benchley The person who writes for fools is always sure of a large audience. Arthur Schopenhauer More than ever before, Americans are suffering from back problems, back taxes, back rent, back auto payments. Robert Orben Art, like morality, consists in drawing the line somewhere. G. K. Chesterton I dont care what is written about me as long as it isnt true. Katherine Hepburn
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Owen Removed 18 April 2008 16:53
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

Robert Orben: Fitness Motivation Quote Older people shouldnt eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.
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Haggis 18 April 2008 18:56
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Originally Posted by
"Girls are like pianos. When theyre not upright, theyre grand." - Benny Hill "A friend is someone whos there when he needs you" - Anon "Committee - a group of men who keep minutes and waste hours." - M. Berle "Im gonna live forever, or die trying." - Joseph Heller (Catch 22) "Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law." - Hubert Humphrey "Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do." Ronald Reagan "Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder" - Anon "I can see clearly now, the brain has gone" - Anon Spit happens (on a babys bib) "I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I must be perfect!" - Anon "Some people say that ones personality is reflected off of their car... Well, I have no car." - Anon
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Silver Surfer 19 April 2008 07:58
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

It never rains but it pours
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K.A .The Robin 19 April 2008 14:06
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Originally Posted by
Spike Milligan......... How long was I in the Army? Five feet eleven. I have the body of an eighteen tear old - I keep it in the fridge. Groucho Marx......... A mans only as old as the woman he feels. A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke. Man does not control his own fate,the women in his life do that for him.
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Silver Surfer 20 April 2008 04:51
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Originally Posted by
Qote of the day

Do or Do not, There is no Try "YODA Empire Strikes back"
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Silver Surfer 20 April 2008 09:18
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Originally Posted by
Glory is Fleeting, but Obscurity is forever Napoleon
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Cassandra 20 April 2008 15:44
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Originally Posted by
God give us grandchildren as a reward for not killing our own children !!!!! Sheila O.McKean.
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Haggis 20 April 2008 16:05
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: sheila ormiston God give us grandchildren as a reward for not killing our own children !!!!! Sheila O.McKean. Sheila, I know you dont mean it, but it did make me laugh, we all feel like that at times but we love them really.
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Silver Surfer 21 April 2008 02:34
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

Home is the wallpaper above the bed, the family dinner table, the church bells in the morning, the bruised shins of the playground, the small fears that come with dusk, the streets and squares and monuments and shops that constitute ones first universe. -- Henry Anatole Grunwald
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John (Scouse) Hirons 21 April 2008 04:12
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Originally Posted by
I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end. Margaret Thatcher (1925 - ), in Observer 4th April 1989
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Cassandra 21 April 2008 09:41
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Originally Posted by
Giving up smoking is easy...Ive done it a thousand times! Mark Twain.
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John (Scouse) Hirons 21 April 2008 13:01
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Originally Posted by
Quoting: Patricia Davies You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it. Robin Williams The only people flying to Europe will be terrorists, so it will be, "Will you be sitting in armed or unarmed?" Robin Williams When the media ask him [George W. Bush] a question, he answers, 'Can I use a lifeline?' Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money. Robin Williams If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number? Robin Williams alright Pat, Welcome home, when are you going to release John the Janner?
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High Flyer 21 April 2008 14:29
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the Day

I have a photographic memory. Unfortunately, it no longer offers same day service. Anon
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High Flyer 21 April 2008 14:35
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the Day

Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then stun you with experience...Anon
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Silver Surfer 22 April 2008 06:38
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

"Whether you think that you can, or you cant you are usually right" Henry Ford.
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K.A .The Robin 22 April 2008 09:59
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Originally Posted by
Quote...... Girls are like pianos - when theyre not upright theyre grand. Benny Hill. Minds are like parachutes - they only function when open. Thomas Dewar.
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Haggis 22 April 2008 14:16
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Originally Posted by
"If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character...Would you slow down? Or speed up?" Chuck Palahniuk quotes freelance Journalist
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John (Scouse) Hirons 22 April 2008 14:39
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Originally Posted by
Death is natures way of telling you to slow down. (anon)
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Silver Surfer 22 April 2008 23:09
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

"Ill Moider Da Bum." Tony Galento
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Silver Surfer 23 April 2008 02:14
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Originally Posted by
Ouote of the Day

Opposition brings concord. Out of discord comes the fairest harmony. -- Heraclitus
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John (Scouse) Hirons 23 April 2008 15:29
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Originally Posted by
The truth is rarely pure and never simple. Modern life would be very tedious if it were either, and modern literature a complete impossibility! - Oscar Wilde
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Hilary Sanderson 23 April 2008 17:16
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Originally Posted by
You know there is a problem with the education system when you realise that out of the 3 Rs only one begins with an R. -- Dennis Miller
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Silver Surfer 24 April 2008 01:21
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

Knowing is not enough; We must Apply. Willing is not enough; We must Do. -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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Cassandra 24 April 2008 10:46
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Originally Posted by
If the fools do not control the world it isnt because they are not in the majority. S.O.McK.
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Haggis 24 April 2008 16:55
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Originally Posted by
"Every man is a fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists of not exceeding the limit."
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Haggis 24 April 2008 17:03
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Originally Posted by
"Some people suffer from insanity, others just enjoy it." -
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John (Scouse) Hirons 24 April 2008 20:22
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Originally Posted by
The ordinary man is an anarchist. He wants to do as he likes. He may want his neighbour to be governed, but he himself doesn't want to be governed. He is mortally afraid of government officials and policemen. - George Bernard Shaw
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Hilary Sanderson 24 April 2008 22:22
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Originally Posted by
The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn. - Alvin Toffler
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Silver Surfer 25 April 2008 00:14
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Originally Posted by
Qoute of the day

Dogs love their friends & bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love & always have to mix love & hate. -Anonymous
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Silver Surfer 26 April 2008 00:31
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Originally Posted by
Tell me what are the prevailing sentiments that occupy the minds of your young men, and I will tell you what is to be the character of the next generation. -- Edmund Burke
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John (Scouse) Hirons 26 April 2008 04:28
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Originally Posted by
A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject. Winston Churchill
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Hilary Sanderson 26 April 2008 09:31
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Originally Posted by
Learn as if you were going to live forever. Live as if you were going to die tomorrow. - Mahatma Gandhi
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Bob 26 April 2008 10:21
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

A friend is a person who knows all about you, and still likes you Elbert Hubbard A man who moralizes is usually a hypocrite and a woman who moralizes is invariably plain. Oscar Wilde If you obey all the rules,you miss all the fun. Katherine Hepburn
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Bob 26 April 2008 14:44
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

If you are being chased by a police dog,try not to go through a tunnel,then on to a little sea-saw,then jump through a hoop of fire. Theyre trained for that. Milton Jones at the Underbelly
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Haggis 26 April 2008 16:15
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Originally Posted by
As soon as I hear music, something in me starts to vibrate. Suzanne Farrell famous dancer
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Cassandra 26 April 2008 18:18
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Originally Posted by
An ideal wife is a woman who has an ideal husband. S.O.McK.
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Soft Southern Barsteward 26 April 2008 22:11
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Originally Posted by
The ideal wife

The Ideal wife is always the one you should have married,and seldom the one you did. The Ideal husband is the one who says yes dear,and lets her have her own way.
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John (Scouse) Hirons 27 April 2008 03:55
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Originally Posted by
A great marriage is not when the perfect couple comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences. Dave Meurer,
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Bob 27 April 2008 16:15
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Originally Posted by
Quote of the day

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is is the same. Oscar Wilde Love : A temporary insanity curable by marriage. Ambrose Bierce
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Haggis 27 April 2008 17:43
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Originally Posted by
Winston Churchill

Yes, madam, I am drunk. But in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. -- (replying to Lady Astors comment Sir, youre drunk!’
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